What do I do with all these chickens?

By Mike Cox

I'm keeping the chickens I make
Not for them, but for my own sake 

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Broken Yolk

By Mike Cox

My name is Deci-eggs-imate,
One that people are starting to hate.
On a touch one in ten,
Are turned into hens,
A sad and statistical fate.

Biscuit Levitation

OK, this wasn't created specifically for My Super First Day, but it's too brilliant to not post:

Thanks to @MikeyJ for the link!

Sparky

By Hillary Monahan

Sometimes people say something smells like shit and what they really mean is "it's musty" or "there's a mildewy funk here". When I say Mary Carlson's basement smelled like shit, I mean it. She had about six of those small yappy dogs, Shit Zoos or whatever, and apparently no one had bothered to teach 'em that you're supposed to drop your bricks outside in the grass. There were about eight zillion tiny brown landmines I had to work around to get to her electrical wiring, and I wondered how in the hell she could live like that. It was disgusting.

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